Fun Date Night Ideas Based on Love Languages

Dates are all about connecting with your significant other, whether your relationship is in its early stages or you have been married for years. Life has a habit of stealing focus from a relationship and even the strongest of connections can become stale over time. Dates do not have to be elaborate or expensive; all they require is thought, planning, and effort. Coming up with date night ideas can even be a fun thing to do together.

Love languages explained

The idea of “love languages” was developed in the early 90s by pastor Gary Chapman. He outlined five specific ways in which individuals express and receive love. Specifically, the five love languages are physical touch, quality time, acts of service, words of affirmation, and gift exchange.

Physical touch refers to hugging, caressing, and embracing, but it also applies to simple and non-erotic forms of touch. Simply sitting near a loved one can be meaningful to the person whose primary love language is physical touch. These people often make physical contact even during a simple conversation through touches on the arm, shoulder, or hand to emphasize certain points.

People who receive love through quality time simply love occupying the same space as their loved one. Conversation or physical contact are optional extras for them because they are primarily pleased by doing any activity together. Even sitting in silence with them as you both complete individual tasks can sometimes count as quality time.

Acts of service are often small, simple favors or tasks done for your loved one. You could show love to them simply by washing the dishes after a meal, picking up their dry cleaning, or fixing things around the house. The fact that you have spent any amount of time and effort accomplishing something for them registers as loving them.

Those who feel loved by hearing words of affirmation thrive on personal, sincere messages of affection. This could be spoken words in a conversation or written words. They are deeply impacted by hearing or reading about the specific things you appreciate about them, or how they have affected your life.

Lastly, some people feel deeply loved when they receive gifts. This doesn’t necessarily mean expensive presents (though it can mean that too), but they receive love in the form of physical tokens. Objects like a stone collected on the beach and given to them with a word about how it reminded you of them, for example, could serve as a meaningful gift to those with this primary love language.

Love languages and date night ideas

Planning a successful date means considering the loved one you are planning the date for. Ideally, you want them to feel seen, valued, and cherished, and you want to enjoy whatever activity you plan with them. When you know the primary way in which your partner receives love, you can plan a creative date and one that will be extra meaningful to your loved one. Here are some ideas for dates based on the love languages.

Physical touch

Physical intimacy can always be a layered topic, and it is best to broach the subject frankly but sensitively with your loved one. Even partners who have been married for years sometimes would benefit from discussing physical intimacy ahead of the date. Love languages often operate with each other, so verbal feedback and consent go hand-in-hand with physical touch.

Physical touch does not only mean sexual intercourse and even married couples might benefit from activities that do not focus solely on intercourse. A fun game like Twister, or a movie in the theater will provide physical contact and proximity (especially if you sit in the loveseat at the theater).

Even an intimate dinner in a booth seat at a quiet restaurant can be meaningful for the fans of physical touch. For a more in-depth connection, you could attempt a couples yoga session at home or focus on some sensual massage.

Quality time

This might seem to be the most obvious love language to satisfy on a date, but it is also the one love language that is most easily taken for granted. There is an emphasis on quality in this love language. This means knowing about your partner’s preferences and picking an activity that they will enjoy doing with you.

“Cooking Together”, Courtesy of Sweet Life, Unsplash.com, CC0 License; For example, if they enjoy cooking you might want to make a meal together for the date. Even if things go awry, it will have been time well spent because they will have done something they enjoy with someone they love.

Pick an activity that is personal to your partner or something brand new for both of you. Pottery classes, an art workshop, a museum exhibition, or a visit to the aquarium are good options for new couples wanting to spend quality time together on a date.

Acts of service

You can get creative with this one and plan an out-of-the-ordinary date. The idea here is to make an effort on the date. If you were looking for something less elaborate, you could do some voluntary service together at a soup kitchen or homeless shelter.

For the more complex date, you could plan a treasure hunt. This could involve going from one destination to the next, finding clues or small gifts that you have concealed until you reach the destination of your date. This might be a picnic spot (maybe they were collecting concealed lunch ingredients in the hunt), or a meaningful spot like the location of your first date.

This could also be a good idea for someone whose primary love language is receiving gifts. The person who loves acts of service will appreciate the effort you went through to plan something unique and meaningful.

Words of affirmation

These are people who often cherish handwritten notes or cards and thrive on honest compliments or observations. For a date, you could take a walk down memory lane and share childhood photos.

Not only is this a fun and surprisingly intimate thing to do together, but it will allow your date to talk about their childhood experiences as you compliment and affirm them. This will also give you an insight into their past, and some chapters of that history might need words of affirmation from you.

Gift giving

Remember that it is not always the monetary value of the gift that is meaningful to the person with this as their love language. Often it is the physical token and the memory or meaning attached to it. As a date, you could spend the day exploring a new place together. Throughout the day you could secretly collect trinkets, such as pebbles, feathers, or curios from gift shops for your partner.

At the end of the day, you could present them with a collection of these found items, with an explanation of the meaning attached to each one. Even if they are of small financial value, the fact that you collected them and connected meaning to them for your partner will communicate love.

Why date night ideas?

Dates are important for the health and longevity of a relationship. They are proof that you are willing to spend effort on staying connected to your loved one. At the beginning of a relationship, dates are a fun and helpful way of getting to know someone at a deeper level. Dates are also a useful way of reinvigorating an older romantic connection with a spouse.

You can take dates to the next level by dialing into your partner’s love language and crafting a date specific to their interests and the way that they receive affection. All the love languages connect and overlap, ensuring that you will hit some kind of target with careful and thoughtful planning.

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