Seattle Christian Counseling Logo

  • ServicesRead about the expertise available
    • Individual ServicesAddress your personal concerns confidentially
      • ADHD
      • Abandonment and Neglect
      • Aging and Geriatric Issues
      • Anger Management
      • Anxiety
      • Bipolar Disorder
      • Chemical Dependency
      • Coaching
      • Counseling for Children
      • Counseling for Teens
      • Codependency
      • Depression
      • Eating Disorders
      • EMDR
      • Grief and Loss
      • Individual Counseling
      • Infidelity and Affairs
      • Men’s Issues
      • OCD
      • Personal Development
      • Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
      • Professional Development
      • Psychological Testing
      • Relationship Issues
      • Sex And Porn Addiction
      • Sexual Abuse
      • Spiritual Development
      • Trauma
      • Weight Loss
      • Women’s Issues
    • Christian Couples CounselingWork through challenges together
      • Couples Counseling
      • Premarital Counseling
      • Marriage Counseling
      • Marriage Intensive
    • Family CounselingEstablish the peaceful home you desire
      • Couples Counseling
      • Counseling for Teens
      • Counseling for Children
      • Family Counseling
    • Group CounselingBenefit from the support of others
      • Men’s Sexual Addiction Recovery
        Group – Chris Chandler
      • Anxiety and Depression Counseling
        Group for Teens and Adolescents
      • All Counseling Groups
    • Online Counseling
    • Anxiety
    • Depression
    • Marriage Counseling
    • Sexual Addiction
  • LocationsChoose from our variety of office locations
    • Bellevue
    •  1Bothell
    • Edmonds
    •  1Everett
    •  1Federal Way
    • kentKent
    • Kirkland Christian CounselingKirkland
    • Lacey Christian CounselingLacey
    •  1Mill Creek
    • The Rhythm Reset: How to Navigate Boundaries and Stress 1Monroe
    • Oak Harbor Office OutsideOak Harbor
    • Poulsbo
    •  1Puyallup
    •  1Redmond
    •  1Seattle Ballard
    •  1Seattle Downtown
    • Seattle Greenlake
    • Silverdale Office FrontSilverdale
    •  1Spokane
    •  1Spokane Valley
    •  1Tacoma
    • Vancouver
    •  1Online Counseling
  • CounselorsFind the best counselor for your needs
  • CareersBecome an affiliated Christian counselor
  • (206) 388-3929Please give us a call, we are here to help
header-image

How to Combat Negative Thinking

Seattle Christian Counseling
https://seattlechristiancounseling.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/10/how-to-combat-negative-thinking-4.jpg 1920 2560
https://seattlechristiancounseling.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/01/seattle-greenlake-6-scaled.jpg
https://seattlechristiancounseling.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/cropped-cropped-seattle-logo.png
6827 Oswego Place NE, Suite B
SEATTLE, WA 98115
United States
6827 Oswego Place NE, Suite B
SEATTLE, WA 98115
United States
Photo of Andi Hefton

Andi Hefton

Oct
2021
06

How to Combat Negative Thinking

Andi Hefton

Individual CounselingPersonal Development

Negative thinking is something so insidious that it can feel like it’s a part of your identity, and it can become hard to face. The negative thoughts that float around a person’s mind can quickly become overwhelming and paralyzing.

6 Ways to Overcome Negative Thinking

Dealing with negative thoughts can feel insurmountable when you are buried under the weight of them, but it is possible. There are ways to retrain the thought patterns and negative habits in your mind and replace them with more positive ones, and below are a few suggestions for doing so.

1. Develop a Growth Mindset

Like us if you are enjoying this content.
How to Combat Negative ThinkingOften negative thinking results from having overly high expectations of oneself or people around you. For instance, if a person has grown up with perfectionist tendencies, then the failure to live up to their ideals may leave them feeling like they always fall short.

This negative thinking translates to such thoughts as, “I’m not good enough,” or “I’ll never get it right!” These negative thought patterns can quickly be transformed by adding just one word… “yet!” or changing “I’m not” to “I am.” As soon as you reframe the thought as, “I can’t get it right…yet” or “I am good enough” you have introduced the idea of a growth mindset.

When you can see yourself as a person who is still learning and growing, and allow for the possibility of failure as a natural part of the learning process, then you open the possibility of trying again or trying something different to reach your goal in the future.

2. Separate Emotions from Facts

Humans are emotional beings. Experiencing emotions, and feeling them strongly, is a part of who we are. Emotions are designed to serve a purpose; however, they are not all that we are, and emotions can be deceptive. If we misinterpret our emotions and add more meaning to them than needed, we could fall into a negative thought trap and perceive that there is no way out. Negative thoughts are the driving force of negative emotions.

One example is removing the sense of disappointment and focusing on the commentary about yourself, such as the belief that you are a failure or the worst person ever. Many times it is difficult to capture what our commentary is, thus focusing on emotions and then question what is driving that emotion.

How to Combat Negative Thinking 1Our thoughts can then lead to questioning those thoughts and reframing them into more helpful ways to think about ourselves or life circumstances. When we allow ourselves to feel our emotions and understand where they are coming from, then we can separate those from our thoughts and move forward.

So, one could say, “I am feeling disappointed with how that project was received.” Once the feelings wane, you can accept that you are more than just that project, recognize that you worked hard on it, and that you did the best you could. By acknowledging the emotions related to any event, you can be more objective about what triggered the feelings.

3. Examine Your Thoughts

Once you have separated your thoughts from your feelings you can begin to work through the thoughts themselves. 2 Corinthians 10:5 teaches us to take every thought captive. What this means is that we recognize that not every thought is good or helpful. When we examine our thoughts, we can determine which thoughts to consider, and which thoughts to dismiss.

One could divide thoughts into two primary camps; critics vs. coaches. The critic points out every flaw and failure. These thoughts are neither objective nor helpful. They will tear apart any effort and offer you no hope.

By contrast, the coach wants the best for you. While the coach may acknowledge a failing, “you didn’t put in your best effort,” the coach will also present hope at the same time, “so here is what you can do about it for next time.” One may even see the Holy Spirit in the role of the coach, willing to give a reproach when necessary and simultaneously holding out grace, providing forgiveness and hope for the future.

Take captive, reject the thoughts from the critic, and listen instead to the voice of grace and hope. This way you can be objective about your mistakes and not give them more sway than they deserve, allowing room for a voice that gives you hope at the same time.

4. Focus on Gratitude

If, while you are taking the negative and unhelpful thoughts captive, you notice that you don’t have many positive thoughts to replace them with, consider starting by counting your blessings. A focus on gratitude can help shift your perspective and give you positive things to cling to when you are feeling down.

How to Combat Negative Thinking 2

This practice may be as simple as counting five things that you are grateful for every morning when you wake up or in the evening before you go to bed, sometimes both. It may involve a little bit more effort and reflection on your part, such as writing a journal or starting a blog where you can consider your life and the things that are most important to you.

The key is to be intentional and consistent about the effort, as you train your mind to see the things around you through the lens of gratitude. Some days it may feel hard to be thankful, but if we put in the effort, we should be able to dig up people, experiences, or things for which we are grateful. When you begin to see all the good things around you, then you will have something to balance against the challenges and the negative thoughts which may accompany them.

5. Consider the Source

When you are struggling with recurring negative thoughts, another helpful exercise can be to consider the source of those thoughts. As mentioned earlier, some unhelpful thoughts may come up because of strong feelings of sadness or disappointment, in which case allowing yourself to feel the emotion may be enough to bring objectivity.

How to Combat Negative Thinking 3

But other thoughts may have been informed by things other people have said about you. If this is the case, you must recognize that other people do not get to define you. You can take any criticism with an element of hesitation, determine if there is any truth or fact in it, consider whether the person saying those words is reliable and cares for you and your wellbeing (though even this is no guarantee that thoughtless words may not be said).

Then decide for yourself what to do with the thought. You can take any element of truth and choose to learn from it and reject any critic that offers nothing more than negativity. You can also consider whether particular situations trigger negative thoughts in yourself, in which case you can preemptively consider positive answers to those negative thoughts so that you are better prepared the next time they assail you.

5. Practice Positive Affirmations

As you are taking captive any negative thoughts and rejecting the unhelpful critics among your thoughts, you would also benefit from reframing your thoughts honestly and positively. Practice speaking the truth in your life. If you are a Christian, remind yourself that God loves you, that you are fearfully and wonderfully made, and speak other Scriptures over your life that may bring light into your circumstances.

If you do not believe in this, then find a voice that affirms you, whether a podcast, a friend, or a motivational book. Find something that speaks truth and positivity. You may want to memorize certain Scriptures or sayings, posting them in visible places in your home, so that you can be reminded of those truths throughout your day.

Simply trying to uproot negative thinking on its own will not work as effectively as it would if you also simultaneously commit to replacing negative thoughts with positive ones.

Conclusion

At the end of the day, combating negative thoughts is an exercise in retraining our minds. This can be done, but not without consistency and effort. It may also require finding someone who can help you, both to process your thoughts and build positive thought patterns and for accountability.

The encouragement of a friend is invaluable. If you need a little more help than a friend can offer, don’t hesitate to get professional help. There is no reason to remain stuck in the darkness of negative thinking.

Photos:
“See the Good”, Courtesy of Nathan Dumlao, Unsplash.com, CC0 License; “You Got This”, Courtesy of Sydney Rae, Unsplash.com, CC0 License; “Believe in Yourself”, Courtesy of Katrina Wright, Unsplash.com, CC0 License; “Bouquet”, Courtesy of Chaewon Lee, Unsplash.com, CC0 License

DISCLAIMER: THIS ARTICLE DOES NOT PROVIDE MEDICAL ADVICE

The information, including but not limited to, text, graphics, images and other material contained on this article are for informational purposes only. No material on this site is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Please contact one of our counselors for further information.

  • Share on Facebook
  • Tweet it
  • ↑ Back to top
Photo of Andi Hefton
Schedule with Andi
  • Appointment Info

  • Your Info

  • This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged.

Andi Hefton

Licensed Mental Health Counselor
(360) 203-7787 andih@seattlechristiancounseling.com

As your counselor, I will help you recognize where your true hope and peace can be found. Whether you’re dealing with trauma, PTSD, depression, anxiety, or other issues, I will work with you to find healing in your own mind, heart, and soul, as well as relational healing with those around you. I have witnessed the amazing work of God in my own life and so many others, and it would be my privilege to walk with you as you seek to discover Him as your true source of lasting hope. Read more articles by Andi »

Other articles that might interest you...

The Process of Christian Counseling
Photo of Nitish Matthew

Nitish Matthew

The Process of Christian Counseling

  A conversation about the process of Christian Counseling with Ryan Likes, Community Counselor at Seattle’s Union Gospel Mission. Nitish:...

continue reading »
Anxiety and Negative Thinking
Seattle Christian Counseling

Anxiety and Negative Thinking

Let’s face it, we’ve all had our anxious moments. However, anxiety disorders are about more than just anxious moments, and...

continue reading »
3 Therapeutic Tips for Parents -- Reflective Language (Part 1)
Seattle Christian Counseling

Why Children’s Counseling?

As you decorate a child’s room with art at their eye level, age-appropriate toys, and child-sized furniture, so children’s counseling...

continue reading »

About Andi

Photo of Andi Hefton

Andi Hefton, MS, LMHC

Licensed Mental Health Counselor

As your counselor, I will help you recognize where your true hope and peace can be found. Whether you’re dealing with trauma, PTSD, depression, anxiety, or other issues, I will work with you to find healing in your own mind, heart, and soul, as well as relational healing with those around you. I have witnessed the amazing work of God in my own life and so many others, and it would be my privilege to walk with you as you seek to discover Him as your true source of lasting hope. View Andi's Profile

Recent articles by Andi

  • Jul 7 · 6 Tips for Being a Supportive Caregiver to Aging Parents
  • May 12 · What is PTSD in Children?
  • Mar 30 · How to Recover from Betrayal
See all articles by Andi »

Related Services

  • Individual Counseling
  • Personal Development

Andi's Office Locations

  • Photo of the Silverdale office

    Silverdale

    Washington

    General Office Number

    (360) 447-0110
    3212 Northwest Byron Street Silverdale, WA 98383

    View Office Details
  • Photo of the Online (WA residence only) office

    Online (WA residence only)

    Washington

    General Office Number

    (206) 388-3929
    444 Northeast Ravenna Boulevard Seattle, WA 98115

    View Office Details

Subscribe to our Newsletter

Seattle Christian Counseling Logo
Seattle Christian Counseling
Professional help with faith-based values
Welcome to Seattle Christian Counseling. We are an association of professional, independently licensed Christian counselors with more than 20 office locations throughout Washington state for your convenience, including the Seattle neighborhoods of Greenlake, Ballard, and Downtown Lower Queen Anne. We look forward to meeting you soon.
© 2022 Seattle Christian Counseling. All rights reserved.
6827 Oswego Place NE, Suite B, Seattle, WA 98115. Tel (206) 388-3929.
Facebook Twitter Online Counseling About Us Privacy Policy Terms of Use Feel free to contact us!
COVID-19 Service Update: We are still open for business. In office and online counseling is available if needed.